Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
