I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
