another moral hangover. fuck.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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