nut hugger
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize