Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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