we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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