you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
