her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize