you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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