guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
He? As in you personified your dick?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
