you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
