And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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