it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
