I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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