Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
