omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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