Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
my poor anus
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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