Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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