Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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