I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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