I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
You were trust falling into bushes
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