shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
