I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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