You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize