Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pants incapable of making pants work
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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