this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Two words: nipple clamps
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