Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize