Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
