i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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