he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Randomize