I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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