I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize