I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
