Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
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