It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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