Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.