it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed