I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
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