i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
