i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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