Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
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Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
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My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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