Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
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