Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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