If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Randomize
