end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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