okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
My dad is sitting where you rode me
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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