it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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