Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
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