wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
