I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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