It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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