u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize